GYWO 2023 week 3/52
Jan. 14th, 2023 03:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sugarspankhorni made some Choices last week that have the baseless confidence of eating cheese with a lactose intolerance. don't you know your body just doesn't work like that, that you'll regret this in only hours? well don't i have egg on my face for asking that question and not: why did you bite off more than you can chew from the self-improvement pie?
this week,theemdash wrote an article for the GYWO community titled "tips for writing daily"-- a post that i really needed in ways you might not expect. daily writing isn't one of my goals, after all. but one of the things that particularly resonated with me in theemdash's post was "your writing habit must meet you where you are". when i was talking with deeppainpizza about our habit plans for the week, one of the topics we had mentioned was exactly this! the simple idea that working with yourself and your quirks vs. against yourself doesn't sound groundbreaking on its face, but internalized ableism teaches us that simplicity isn't enough-- how can we arrive at easy answers if "easy" is dismissed right out of the gate?
so what were these Choices i made? let's address this by going over my goals from last week first. i outlined my rare femslash exchange fic (loosely), though i'm struggling to find good bones for it. i wrote a few hundred words for that as well as the pwp i mentioned earlier, so that's 2/3 of my goals completed. but the elephant in the room Choice is in my first attempt at "time of day" style habit-- as a refresher, this was my goal last week:
thankfully, in a show of some personal growth, i recognized this pretty early on. instead of trying to stubbornly push my way through something i knew wouldn't work, i decided that i can shelf this decision today and try something new. being able to course-correct like that is something that i'm NOT the best at, so i'm feeling pretty proud of myself for this. moving forward without guilt toward a more realistic goal for myself-- it's okay to try something that might not be for me, but i won't neglect my needs in doing so. that's a promise!
with this in mind, here are my goals for this week:
this week,
theemdash wrote an article for the GYWO community titled "tips for writing daily"-- a post that i really needed in ways you might not expect. daily writing isn't one of my goals, after all. but one of the things that particularly resonated with me in theemdash's post was "your writing habit must meet you where you are". when i was talking with deeppainpizza about our habit plans for the week, one of the topics we had mentioned was exactly this! the simple idea that working with yourself and your quirks vs. against yourself doesn't sound groundbreaking on its face, but internalized ableism teaches us that simplicity isn't enough-- how can we arrive at easy answers if "easy" is dismissed right out of the gate?week 3: think harder about your thoughts on your thoughts
so what were these Choices i made? let's address this by going over my goals from last week first. i outlined my rare femslash exchange fic (loosely), though i'm struggling to find good bones for it. i wrote a few hundred words for that as well as the pwp i mentioned earlier, so that's 2/3 of my goals completed. but the elephant in the room Choice is in my first attempt at "time of day" style habit-- as a refresher, this was my goal last week:
i'm going to try to write physical notes during my lunch break at work and then transcribe them in the evening time
now tell me-- what's wrong with this picture? i'll tell you: when i take a break at work i need to stare at a wall and not think about anything for at least an hour. my job is high-stress and, as a neurodivergent person, i need a good chunk of time to rejuvenate in order to be functional. i knew this as i wrote it. so why did i think that this would be a successful approach to habit building? i don't know about you, but my internalized ableism is often telling me that life will be so much easier if i can just change myself to suit these unmet goals of mine. it's only until recently that i've considered something so simple: that the key to improving my quality of life might just be working with what i've got. an easy answer can be a good one, for your goal and for your health.
thankfully, in a show of some personal growth, i recognized this pretty early on. instead of trying to stubbornly push my way through something i knew wouldn't work, i decided that i can shelf this decision today and try something new. being able to course-correct like that is something that i'm NOT the best at, so i'm feeling pretty proud of myself for this. moving forward without guilt toward a more realistic goal for myself-- it's okay to try something that might not be for me, but i won't neglect my needs in doing so. that's a promise!
with this in mind, here are my goals for this week:
- write/outline the final third of my current pwp. beginnings are a huge struggle for me but i've got a decent outline at least on the beginning. let's get that back portion filled out-- that's the part where the reason i wanted to write this fic happens. gonna try to channel that excitement!
- have at least one "focus session" this week. i want to have a "sit down, let's goooo" moment, a writing date if you will. i'm not going to put a specific time limit on it, i just want to make an event of it. have a special drink, a special treat, hang out and do some sprints! i have a pretty big mental health evaluation at the end of this week so i'm nervous about how that will affect the weekend but i'm gonna do my best to be adaptable here.
- habit goal for the week: continue waking up a little earlier in the morning and trying to use that time, see what writing i can get done. when i pivoted away from lunchtime writing i started doing this-- only succeeded twice but it was good when i did! i'm a notoriously sleepy person so this might seem against the grain from what i've been talking about before. but in my entire life i've never actually tried waking up early, and i used to have the best creative time on my morning bus rides when i still rode the bus. so i want to see if i can keep that up for the full week and see how that goes. lighting a candle has been a good habit cue for me so far, so i'm keeping with that.
i'm continuously surprised at the benefits of this challenge and how they have been so essential to me. accountability is the primary push for GYWO, but i scoffed at that; if someone asks "hey did you do X today?" i can just say no! but check-ins with friends have been REALLY helpful-- deeppainpizza has been checking in with me regularly to ask how my goals have been going, and i don't want to disappoint by repeatedly saying i didn't do anything if the only reason why i didn't was "it sounded hard". lots of thanks are in order for this.
so wish me luck and tell me about your goals! what are you working on this week? do you also struggle with neglecting yourself and your own needs for the sake of meeting a goal? what do you do when you recognize that in yourself? i hope that you treat yourself with lots of patience and have a good week! thank you again!!
so wish me luck and tell me about your goals! what are you working on this week? do you also struggle with neglecting yourself and your own needs for the sake of meeting a goal? what do you do when you recognize that in yourself? i hope that you treat yourself with lots of patience and have a good week! thank you again!!
no subject
Date: 2023-01-15 11:34 pm (UTC)I'm so glad you ended up reaping some lessons about yourself from it, though! It's great that you were able to identify the problem, extract the essential ingredients and see how you can apply it to yourself without making changes that would only serve as stress aggregators. I'm someone who also needs time to decompress for a long while after work, so I'm taking note from you as well!
The "focus session" is such a good idea, I have to try that myself. I think the thing holding me back from my writing sessions, even when I give myself the "just write anything" leeway, is that I want at least one of them to be where some major progress is made. If I heap too many of those on my plate per week I'll crash and burn fast. But if I plan do it once a week with a little treat to entice me further? I think I can work with that!
I hope doing writing in the morning ends up being of help to you! I actually think sleepiness can be a nice aid in writing because you're less likely to get stuck with editing and being self-critical when your mindset is "shit gotta write all this down before I forget it" instead. And if you get really into it it can end up giving you a nice boost of energy that'll wake you up and get you ready for the day, so win-win. :D
For this week I'm going to try using 10-minute writing sessions with that "just write anything" leeway granted for most of the days, then take one day out to do a "focus session" where I'll sit down at a cafe and edit a wip, outline an idea, draft something, or all of the above with a 30-minute minimum window that I can extend as needed. I've certainly neglected myself and my own needs for the sake of meeting a goal in the past, and I think this will give me just enough to do that I can feel I'm making something with ease while still giving myself space to breathe and rest before getting to work on my more ambitious projects.
Best of luck to you on your goals, I'm so happy GYWO and check-ins have been helpful to you!
no subject
Date: 2023-01-17 11:42 pm (UTC)tell me about how your writing session goes!! cafe writing... is so fun. i was talking with a gywo pal about how a 3rd location (i.e. not your house or work) is SO powerful!!! ive been considering holin up at the university library just cuz.
" I've certainly neglected myself and my own needs for the sake of meeting a goal in the past," oh buddy i am the KING of doing just that, i really feel you there. it's tough to know your own limits and set boundaries etc etc. you live and learn!
cheering you on as always!
no subject
Date: 2023-01-18 05:53 pm (UTC)Third locations do wonders. I often forget just how wired my brain is to the setting it's in until I go, "But what if we did it in this setting we normally aren't in." Libraries are up there with cafes as the best locations for relocating your brain to focus on another task imo! (And if there's both? Even better.)
Cheering you on too, buddy 🎉 🎉